The other bird

    George was taking care of a parrot for his aunt. This parrot was very nasty. To get rid of the bird, George put it in the freezer.

    The parrot kept screaming and insulting George until finally it stopped.

    George thought to himself, “Oh no! I froze my aunt’s bird to death.”

    He opened the door and saw that the bird was alive.

    The bird said, “I’m sorry for my behavior and will never act up again.”

    George asked: “What made you change?”

    The bird answered, “Because I saw what you did to the other bird.”  

    Cure hiccups

    Q: A man goes into a bar and asks for a glass of water. The barman pulls out a gun, and points it at the customer. “Thank you,” replies the customer and walks out. What happened?

    A: The customer had hiccups.  

    What’s the matter?

    One day an English grammar teacher was looking ill.

    A student asked, “What’s the matter?”

    “Tense,” answered the teacher, describing how he felt.

    The student paused, then continued, “What was the matter? What has been the matter? What might have been the matter?”

    (Source: The Internet TESL Journal)