Giant baby

A: Did you hear that a baby was fed on elephant’s milk and gained 10 kilos in a week?

B: That’s impossible. Whose baby?

A: An elephant’s.

Drunk

A very drunk man comes out of the bar and sees another very drunk man.

He looks up in the sky and says: “Is that the sun or the moon?”

The other drunk man answers: “I don’t know. I’m a stranger here myself.”

I’m the groom

A police officer in a small town stopped a motorist who was speeding down Main Street. “But officer,” the man began, “I can explain.”

“Just be quiet,” snapped the officer. “I’m going to let you cool your heels in jail until the chief gets back.”

“But, officer, I just wanted to say,...”

“And I said to keep quiet! You’re going to jail!”

A few hours later the officer looked in on his prisoner and said, “Lucky for you that the chief’s at his daughter’s wedding. He’ll be in a good mood when he gets back.”

“Don’t count on it,” answered the fellow in the cell. “I’m the groom.”

(SD-Agencies)