Wrong banana?

    Two farmers were taking their first train trip. A vendor came down the corridor selling bananas, which they’d never seen. Each bought one.

    The first one eagerly peeled the banana and bit into it just as the train went into a tunnel.

    When the train emerged from the tunnel, he looked across to his friend and said: “I wouldn’t eat that if I were you.”

    “Why not?”

    “I took one bite and went blind for half a minute.”

    Why so expensive?

    A lawyer finds out he has an inoperable brain tumor. It’s so large, they have to do a brain transplant. His doctor gives him a choice of available brains.

    There’s a jar of rocket scientist brains for $10 an ounce, a jar of regular scientist brains for $15 an ounce, and a jar of lawyer brains for the sum of $800 an ounce.

    The outraged lawyer asks: “How come the lawyer brains are so expensive?” The doctor replies: “Do you know how many lawyers it takes to get an ounce of brains?”

    One life jacket short

    As the storm raged, the captain realized his ship was sinking fast. He called out: “Anyone here know how to pray?”

    One man stepped forward. “Aye, Captain, I know how to pray.”

    “Good,” said the captain, “you pray while the rest of us put on our life jackets — we’re one short.”

    (SD-Agencies)