A good dancer

    Girl: You would be a good dancer except for two things.

    Boy: What are the two things?

    Girl: Your feet.

    Pain in the eye

    Patient: Doctor, I have a pain in my eye whenever I drink tea.

    Doctor: Take the spoon out of the mug before you drink.

    Help!

    Patient: Doctor! You’ve got to help me! Nobody ever listens to me. No one ever pays any attention to what I have to say.

    Doctor: Next please!

    Confusion

    A: Just look at that young person with the short hair and blue jeans. Is it a boy or a girl?

    B: It’s a girl. She’s my daughter.

    A: Oh, I’m sorry, sir. I didn’t know that you were her father.

    B: I’m not. I’m her mother.

    Fly in the soup

    A man asked for a meal in a restaurant. The waiter brought the food and put it on the table.

    After a moment, the man called the waiter and said: “Waiter! Waiter! There’s a fly in my soup!”

    “Please don’t speak so loudly, sir,” said the waiter, “or everyone will want one.”