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在线翻译:
szdaily -> Fun -> 
Fun of the Week
    2015-08-12  08:53    Shenzhen Daily

    An accident

    A couple of New Jersey hunters were out in the woods when one of them fell to the ground. He didn’t seem to be breathing, his eyes were rolled back in his head.

    The other guy whipped out his cellphone and called emergency services. He gasped to the operator, “My friend is dead! What can I do?”

    The operator, in a calm, soothing voice, said, “Just take it easy. I can help. First, let’s make sure he’s dead.”

    There was a silence, then a shot was heard. The guy’s voice came back on the line. He said, “Okay, now what?”

    

    The big sale

    It was the day of the big sale. Rumors of the sale and some advertising in the local paper were the main reason for the long line that formed by 8:30 in the morning in front of the store. A small man pushed his way to the front of the line, only to be pushed back, amid loud and colorful curses.

    On the man’s second attempt, he was punched square in the jaw, knocked around a bit and then thrown to the end of the line again.

    As he got up the second time, he said to the person at the end of the line, “That does it! If they hit me one more time, I don’t open the damn store!”

    

    A big entrance

    The graveside service had just barely finished when there was a tremendous bolt of lightning, followed by massive clap of thunder, accompanied by even more thunder rumbling in the distance.

    The little old man looked at the pastor and calmly said, “Well, she’s there.”

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