Happiness is a serious moneymaker. People around the world spend hundreds of billions of dollars trying to avoid the tough stuff and feel good about themselves, whether that’s through prescription pills, going crazy with dieting and fitness, or that time-tested elixir of life: alcohol.

Some myths about happiness actually make you unhappy — so ditching them is, paradoxically, part of finding happiness. Here are some common myths.

When you achieve a goal, you’ll be happy

Land the promotion, the spouse, the Lambo, the goal weight, the condo, whatever it is — you’ll finally experience eternal happiness. Hey, it’s not your fault for believing this, since you’ve likely been fed the American dream all the time.

But this logic is flawed. Achievements don’t protect you from feeling like crap, and they definitely don’t make you superhuman. Multimillionaires still get depressed. People with perfect bodies still get dumped. Steady, passive income doesn’t protect you from losing someone to cancer. If you can start appreciating where you are, rather than basing your sense of fulfillment on some future accomplishment, you’ll be much closer to happiness.

When you find the right person, you’ll be happy

If you think being in a relationship is necessary for happiness, you’re going to feel inadequate and probably anxious when you’re single. There’s no doubt a strong relationship can make your life better in a lot of ways, but it’s certainly not a requirement. In fact, many people feel lonelier and more disconnected in a relationship than outside of one.

When you’re unhappy, it’s natural to blame your relationship status, but try not to — instead of waiting for your “soul mate” to bump into you, see if there are other ways to meet your needs.

Being happy means you’ll never feel like crap

The “happily ever after” stuff just isn’t real. To be human is to feel, and it’s a guarantee that you’ll feel disappointment, loss, anger, guilt, sadness, fear, conflict, embarrassment, frustration and so on and so on. These feelings are universal; happiness is about being able to make space for all these shitty emotions, not just the positive ones. They mean you’re not a robot or a psychopath.

Words to Learn 相关词汇

【处方】 chǔfāng prescription an instruction written by a medical practitioner that authorizes a patient to be provided a medicine or treatment

【心理变态者】xīnlǐ biàntài zhě psychopath a person suffering from chronic mental disorder with abnormal or violent social behavior

幸福是棵正儿八经的摇钱树。世界各地的人们花费数千亿美元来躲避难关、寻求快乐，要么服用处方药、疯狂节食和健身，要么求助久经考验的长生不老药 —— 酒精。

有些关于幸福的神话其实会让你不幸福 —— 所以，摆脱这些神话，反而是寻找幸福的一部分。以下就是常见的几个神话。

实现了目标，你就会幸福

无论是职务晋升、寻得伴侣、购得跑车、体重达标，还是拥有公寓 —— 实现了，你就会感受到无限幸福。嘿，相信这种神话并不是你的错，因为你被灌输了这种美国梦。

但它的逻辑漏洞百出。即使取得各种成就，也并不会让你感觉良好，更绝对不会让你变成超人。百万富翁也会有心情抑郁的时候。拥有完美身材的人也会失恋。稳定的被动收入不能保证你身边的人不因癌症去世。如果你能欣赏目前的处境，而不是依赖还未实现的某项成就带来的满足感，你就离幸福更近。

遇到对的人，你就会幸福

如果你认为只有谈恋爱才幸福，那你会在单身时感到空虚，还很可能感到焦虑。毫无疑问，一段良好的恋爱关系能在很多方面让你的人生更棒，但这并不是必要条件。事实上，相比起单身，很多人在恋爱中感到更加孤独、与世隔绝。

当你感到不幸福，你会很自然地怪罪于情感状态，但是请不要这样做，而要想其他办法满足你的需求，而不是等待你的“灵魂伴侣”突然出现在你面前。

感觉幸福意味着永远不会心情糟糕

“从此过上了幸福生活”之类的话根本就是假的。人生在世就是要体验。你肯定会体验到失望、失落、愤怒、愧疚、悲伤、恐惧、矛盾、尴尬、挫折，等等。这些情绪人皆有之；幸福是能够包容所有这些糟糕情绪，而不仅仅是那些积极的情绪。体验到这些情感意味着你不是机器人或者精神病人。

(chinadaily.com.cn)