Only 7 years

    One Sunday afternoon, a guy walks into a bar with his pet dog.

    The bartender said, “Sorry, pal. No pets allowed.”

    The man replied, “This is a special dog. Turn on the Jets game and you’ll see.” The bartender, anxious to see what will happen, turned on the game.

    The guy said, “Watch. Whenever the Jets score, my dog does flips.” The Jets keep scoring field goals and the dog keeps flipping and jumping.

    “Wow! That’s one hell of a dog you got there. What happens when the Jets score a touchdown?” asked the bartender.

    The man replied: “I don’t know. I’ve only had him for seven years.”

    Can you pass it?

    A huge college freshman decided to try out for the football team.

    “Can you tackle?” asked the coach.

    “Watch this,” said the freshman, who proceeded to run smack into a telephone pole, shattering it to splinters.

    “Wow,” said the coach.

    “I’m impressed. Can you run?”

    “Of course I can run,” said the freshman. He was off like a shot, and in just over nine seconds, he had run a hundred yard dash.

    “Great!” enthused the coach.

    “But can you pass a football?”

    The freshman hesitated for a few seconds.

    “Well, sir,” he said, “if I can swallow it, I will probably pass it.”