“Thanks, guys… thanks for all the days together. Thanks, Jenny; you always lent me your pen when I didn’t bring mine. Thanks, Abigail; remember that time I slipped and scraped my knee? You were the one to help me up and take me to the clinic. I mean, thank you…everyone.”

    I thought of these statements again and again in my mind, lacking the courage to say them out loud.

    Then English class began. There stood our English teacher — she had been teaching our class for a long time, and it would be a lie to say I wasn’t connected to her in some special way. I wanted to say “thank you” to her; yet, I always thought there would be another chance. If there ever was a chance, I had wasted it. Today would be my last day alive; so it’s now or never.

    “Thank you, Miss. Thank you for appreciating and encouraging me all these years,” I said to her after the class. She looked a bit confused and asked me why I said this to her. I just smiled — a sad smile, indeed.

    School was soon over. As I stood up and picked up my schoolbag, I heard a familiar voice again: “Hey, Mary! Wanna go home with me?”

    I knew it must be Lydia. She had always been one of my best friends, and she was the one who taught me what true friendship means. “Of course, and I…I mean…”

    “Yes?”

    “I mean…thank you for being friends with me for such a long time. Thank you for all the love you gave me.”

    I was feeling embarrassed for never saying a thankful word to Lydia since we met. Well, time couldn’t rewind now. Today is my last chance and I can only try to save this day, I thought.

    Dusk replaced dawn, and the horizon was decorated with fluorescent clouds. Lydia waved me goodbye and disappeared at the turn. I forced myself to smile, before walking home with a heavy heart. That must have been the first time in my life I wished I could have been a more naturally thankful person. Instead, I’ve been someone who scarcely says “thank you” in my life. A strong remorseful feeling almost sent tears to my eyes, but I blinked hard and held it back.

    The moment I stepped into my home, I was greeted by the welcoming smell of the dinner made by my mom. I went to the dining room as usual. Seeing the dishes on the table, I knew Mom must have spent some time preparing the delicious meal for me, just like every evening before. That day, it really gave me quite a different feeling to know that I would never taste her cooking anymore. The moment Mom came out from the kitchen, I wrapped my arms around her and lay my head on her shoulder. Her hair had the wonderful scent of lavender.

    “Thank you, Mom, for taking care of me for 10 years — I mean, for every single day of my life. Thank you very much, really. I love you forever, Mom.”

    It was really difficult for me to press down the tears at that moment; but I did it. I didn’t want to show weakness on my last day alive.