A wrinkle in time

A little girl got on her grandpa’s lap and said, “Did God make me?”

“Yes,” the grandpa replied.

“Did God make you too?”

“Yes,” the grandpa said.

“Well,” the little girl said, looking at his wrinkles and thinning hair. “He sure is doing a better job nowadays!”

A life of crime

A banana peel and a banana are robbing a store. “Don’t worry,” says the peel. “I’ve got you covered!”

Rotation

Q: What animal rotates at least 200 times after it dies?

A: A rotisserie chicken.

Ants

Q: Why did the ants dance on the jam jar?

A: The lid said, “Twist to open.”

Afterschool snack

Q: Why did the boy eat his homework?

A: His teacher said it was a piece of cake.