THESE days, parents think it is most important for them to raise kids who are caring. We want children who are emotionally stable and empathetic. We want kids who are equipped to deal with a difficult and ever-changing world.

In other words, we want kids with high EQ. Here’s what parents need to know about the concept and how to get started.

There isn’t a clear-cut definition for what EQ (emotional quotient) actually means because it’s really a loose, unofficial term. But generally, when people talk about EQ, they’re talking about a person’s emotional intelligence. And according to psychologist and science journalist Daniel Goleman, who helped popularize the term in the 1990s, emotional intelligence generally encompasses four domains: a person’s self-awareness, their ability to self-manage, their social awareness, and their ability to manage relationships effectively.

Put even more simply? Emotional intelligence is all about having “greater awareness of your emotions so that you can manage them more effectively,” said Korrel Kanoy, author of “The Student EQ Edge: Emotional Intelligence and Your Academic and Personal Success.”

The first step? Help kids identify their feelings.

One of the most powerful things parents and caregivers can do to help children foster emotional intelligence is simply to help them figure out what they’re feeling.

Another idea? Have kids rank their emotions on a scale from 1-10, and do that yourself — pointing out when you’re feeling really heated or when you’re calm.

Learning how to cope with emotions is, obviously, a lifelong project, and it’s not your job as a parent to have all the answers. But you can help children develop emotional intelligence by showing them the ways you grapple with difficult feelings.

Kids learn by watching their parents, particularly when they’re young. So be really deliberate about pointing out when you experience difficult emotions yourself, and be equally deliberate about talking through how you cope.

Lastly, there is a third, crucial step to this process that Kanoy said parents sometimes forget. When you see your kid identifying what they’re feeling and actively trying to find ways to cope with it, pile on the praise. Let them know you value their efforts.

Despite the fact that so many parents say they want to raise emotionally stable, caring children, surveys suggest that kids mistakenly believe that their parents are much more concerned about their personal success. “Acknowledge their hard work,” Kanoy said. “Because it is hard work.” Then commit to doing that hard work together. (SD-Agencies)