At a first date

John: I work with animals every day!

Mary: Oh, how sweet! What is it that you do?

John: I’m a butcher.

What do you say?

A nurse says to a new father, “Your baby is very pretty.” The father looks pleased, “Really? Come on, don’t you say this to everybody?”

The nurse shakes her head, “No, of course not.” The father wonders, “So what do you say if the baby’s ugly?” The nurse smiles, “Then I say the baby really takes after its father.”