Shirley Xiao, Shenzhen College of International Education

If you ask me what sport I’m good at, swimming immediately comes to mind. It’s as if half of my life was spent in water. I have trained in so many pools with different coaches, attended so many competitions, and won a lot of awards too.

But it has been a bumpy journey filled with tears and tantrums. I started training in first grade of primary school. On my way to the swimming lessons, my stomach would churn with anxiety and fear at the thoughts of the tough schedules, and of my ruthless coach, who could make all my smiles go away with a cold scold. I would panic and stare at the clock an hour before the training actually began, frustrated at the ticking sound of time lapse. Dinners before trainings were eaten with no appetite; even the food I usually enjoyed became a drudge. By the time I arrived at the pool, my heart would be stone cold.

I’ve always been a good swimmer — the medals and trophies could prove it to you — but I hated the sport through the end of my junior middle school. I couldn’t understand the paradox myself.

Then things changed in high school. For one thing, it was no longer easy for me to win gold medals. Most people my age already gave up swimming because of heavy schoolwork loads, and the only ones left for me to compete against were professionals. They would train every day, while I would train just twice a week. Their priority was their swimming scores; I worried about my academic grades.

Today, with my competitors much stronger than me, I’ve readjusted my goal from “being the best” to “not being the worst.” For the first time in my life, I’ve lagged behind in races.

This is a unique and fresh experience, which has taught me a good lesson about life.

Acknowledging the possibility to end up in last place, I stop worrying and can enjoy swimming more than before. The water flow clears my mind. I don’t mind how humiliating it would be to end up last, or how fast the others are. Now I only care about my own performance: Have I improved?

More than physical training, swimming has brought me enlightenment and a new mindset toward life. I enjoy watching the coach demonstrate the swimming postures to me, gasp at how humans and water can work so well together, replay the details in my mind trying to improve, and relish the moment diving into the cool water after a long restless day.

Thanks to swimming, I have become a physically and mentally stronger person. And because of this, I know that swimming is my go-to sport and lifetime hobby.